Category: Life


My Love For You Will Never Die…

November 21st, 2011… it was a rather warm night, humidity hung in the air clinging onto my skin despite having two fans blasting at full speed towards me.  I was feeling restless.  A check on the clock and I saw it was 2:00am.  Sleep wasn’t anywhere near and so I continued playing ‘Jungle Jewels’ on Facebook, determined to beat my last high score.  I played for another hour and then told myself that I needed to force myself to sleep so I logged out, switched off everything and prepared for bed.  Just as I laid my head on my pillow, my room door opened and mom came in to flick the light on.  The moment the light came on, I looked up at her and she said, “Ucu is gone.”  I was shocked.  All I could say was, “What???”  And she repeated those words, “Ucu is gone.”  I was stunned.  “When, how?” was all I could say.  She said that she just got the news from my grandmother and she turned and left my room without anymore explanation.  I sat stunned on my bed trying to digest what I had just heard but somehow my brain was slow in digesting the words and my heart just refused to believe what I had just heard.  I left my room and went outside to the TV room where I saw mom and dad busy on their phones making calls to God knows who.  Everything that happened after that is foggy to me.  Getting into my cousin’s car and driving off to pick up my grandmother at her place, it all seemed unreal. Even during the drive to the hospital I still couldn’t accept or believe that my beloved uncle was really gone.  Mom was already crying in the car on the drive to the hospital but I refused to cry…. I thought that by refusing to cry, all of this wouldn’t be true.  I know it was wishful thinking on my part but I had to hold on to some thread of hope no matter how flimsy that hope is.

When we arrived at the hospital, we went straight to the morgue.  It was only when the attendant uncovered his face and I saw him lying there that the truth finally hit me.  And that was when the tears finally came.  He looked so peaceful, like as though he was sleeping.  He even had a smile on his face.  As I touched his face and bent down to kiss him I kind of expected him to open his eyes and start teasing me for being so mushy…. but of course that didn’t happen.  His eyes remained closed, his smile remained on his face, but he was never going to wake up again.

My dear beloved uncle, Syed Feisal, was more than just an uncle to me.  He was the big brother I never had, my play mate when I was a kid, my best friend, my confidant, my protector.  With only two years separating our age gap, growing up together, we were inseparable.  There was nothing about me that he didn’t know and nothing about him that I didn’t know.  We were that close.  Unlike some, who were close when they were kids but grew apart when they start having new friends or when they reach adulthood, that was never the case between my uncle and I.  We remained close right till the very end.  Even though it’s already 11 days since his passing, I’m still struggling with the fact that he’s really gone.  I’m still not over the shock as he went so sudden.  If he had been ill and we’re all aware of it then it wouldn’t be so bad coz then it’d be easier to come to terms with his passing but he wasn’t ill!  He was complaining of chest pains around midnight, his wife took him to the hospital as he was having trouble breathing, within an hour or so, his condition suddenly worsened and next thing we knew, he breathed his last breath at around 3:00am. The doctor said that he had multi organ dysfunction, that his heart, lungs, and kidneys had stopped functioning.  But why????  How????  I guess these are the few mysteries that will always baffle us.

He’s at a better place now and I know in my heart of heart that he’s watching over us, he’s probably smiling right now watching me writing this post and struggling to put the words together to best pour out what’s in my heart.  But I know that he knows how I really feel about him.  Words are not necessary for the bond and love that we shared were spoken long ago without words.

Dearest Ucu,

Words cannot express our sadness and sense of loss as we mourn your passing.  But instead of seeing the end of things, we believe that life is an eternal journey and one of constant new beginnings.  I will remember all that you’ve told me, I will cherish all the wonderful memories and I will live my life the way that you’d want me to.  I will be strong in facing this difficult time.  I’m still numb and I will need time to be back to my normal self again but I know I will get there someday.  You may not be with us physically but your spirit lives on inside of us.  Watch over us, Ucu, and keep us safe.  I miss you terribly and my love for you is for eternity.  Rest in peace, Ucu, and may Allah be with you always.  Al-Fatihah.

I’d like to share a poem that was written in the 1930’s and it goes like this…

Do not stand at my grave and weep, I am not there; I do not sleep.  I am a thousand winds that blow, I am the diamond glints on snow, I am the sun on ripened grain, I am the gentle autumn rain.  When you awaken in the morning’s hush, I am the swift uplifting rush, of quiet birds in circled flight, I am the soft stars that shine at night.  Do not stand at my grave and cry, I am not there; I did not die.

Farewell, Ucu.  Till we meet again someday, somewhere…


Then and Now…

It’s the 10th season of American Idol and I’ve been hooked on the show ever since it was brought to our shores during the 3rd season.  Over the years, I’ve made it a point not to miss a single performance show or the result show and this year is no different.

As I was watching the result show this evening with my mom, I can’t help but appreciate the changes they’ve made in their format.  Getting Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler as judges was a good move for they’re are also performers so they know first hand what the business is really like plus they can relate better to the anxiety and nervousness of the contestants.  It may be easy for us viewers to criticise the contestants in their singing skills but try doing it yourself in front of a big audience and on national TV and I bet we’ll be shitting bricks as well!

I also think it’s a very brilliant idea to get music Producers involved this year to work with the contestants as this gives them a chance to experience and know what it’s really like to be working with professionals on a professional level, in a real studio instead of just sitting in some cosy living room with a piano to accompany their singing.  This is also an opportunity for them to be ‘noticed’ by record Producers – should they enough potential to be the next singing sensation.

Looking at this year’s top 13 hopefuls, I have to say that I favour the guys more as I feel that they have more to bring to the table; they are a lot more daring in taking risks.  The girls tend to be ‘safe’ by remaining in their comfort zone, which can get a bit boring after awhile.

Like previous years, I tend to make my own predictions on who’s going to be booted out at the result show and my predictions this year has been quite spot on so far – I expected the first two to go would be girls and I was right.  The girls really need to step up in their game and they need to do it fast or all of them will be sent home one by one each week.  As for the boys, I like all of them except Jacob Lusk and that’s because I can only take so much of his gospel sound.  I mean, taking a Heart song, “Alone”, and singing it gospel style..?  Come on….

Looking back at all the past top 12 or 13, how many of them have really made it in the music business as successful international recording artistes?  Not many.  Okay, maybe it’s not fair to expect them to flourish into international recording artistes but really, how many of them have made it big in America?  Not that many either.  People like LaToya Jackson, Constantine Maroulis and Justin Guerrini have ventured into broadway.  Why?  Because maybe there isn’t a place for them in the recording industry.  And that is sad because they all auditioned for American Idol with high hopes of becoming successful recording artistes.

In the past, they have picked contestants who can sing well and some are easy on the eyes to have a showdown and sing according to the themes they’ve decided upon each week.  And each week we’ll hear comments like, “You sound like you’re singing on a cruise ship” by Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson will be trying to sound hip and cool by calling everyone “Dogg”, while Paula Abdul will come up with all the fancy and big words which can sometimes boggle someone’s mind.  What were they trying to prove?  How were they helping the contestants and the show?  And where was the direction they were going in finding a star?  I’m just glad that the brains behind American Idol have finally woken up and realise that some serious changes need to be made if they hope to find a worthy recording artiste who knows the path they want to be in musically.  Without this change, American Idol would be just another singing competition with a bunch of people who can sing well and personally, I don’t think that is enough for a reality show this big a scale.

That thing called “love”….

It’s been a long while since I last wrote anything in here …. a few good friends have asked why, one even asked if the world had suddenly stopped!  Hahahaha!!!!  To be honest, I just didn’t have anything to write about.  Then this morning I woke up to the sounds of The Lite Breakfast Show where the morning duo were talking about what I thought was quite an interesting and appropriate topic (considering the timing) …. they say that women feel that men don’t say “I love you” enough to their partner.  The duo had quite a good response from their listeners who called up, more than willing to share their two cents worth and also to share some of their own personal experience.  One guy said that he’d rather show it by gestures rather than saying those 3 words everyday just for the sake of saying them, he even said that if wifey insist on hearing those words everyday than he might as well just record his voice repeating those words over and over again and then give it to her so that whenever she needs to hear them words then all she needs to do is just play the tape.  Hahaha!!!  I thought that was sarcastically funny but hey, the dude made a lot of sense 🙂

With today being the eve of Valentine’s, and not to mention it’s also my wedding anniversary, I’m definitely feeling love in the air, which kinda inspired me to drop some words in here tonight. 

I’ve been spending quite a number of my adultlife wondering about that thing called “love”.  It’s such a simple word but how much do we really understand the true depth of the meaning of the word?  And….is it even possible to “fall out of love”?  The way I look at it, if you were to “fall in love” with someone then some years later you break up with the person and say it’s coz “you’ve fallen out of love” …. then it wasn’t love in the first place.  Love doesn’t have an expiry date for love is a special bond built by two people who have a special closeness towards each other.  I’ve also realised that it isn’t possible to stop loving someone.  Couples may break up, friends may drift apart, time and life may get in the mix but if love was built somewhere it is always gonna be there.  Which brings me back to the topic I heard on radio this morning …. I totally agree with the caller’s comment coz at the end of the day, it’s the quality that truly matters and not so much the quantity.

I”m dedicating this post to the people I love …. To my best friend, my soulmate, my other half …. Happy Anniversary, baby!!!  We made it through another year.  Woohoo!!!  🙂  To my best friend, my confidant, my mother …. you mean everything to me.  I love you, Mom!!!  To my pillar, my strength, my Grandmother …. it’s partly becoz of you that I am who I am today.  Thank you. 

Lastly, to my extended family, my brothers and sisters ~ Mandy, MAG, Zul, Marty, Arthur, Pat, Cash, Steve, Mubarak …. we’ve come a quite a long way since those “good ol’ days”.  I’m happy to know that the bond that was built among us through a radio show didn’t go out the window after the show’s over.  Thank you, guys, for being my family …. love you all!

Today, after almost two weeks since his death, the King of Pop is finally laid to rest.  I stayed up to watch the memorial service and I must say that it was definitely worth staying up for.  Though it was all decided at the last-minute (according to the organisers) for the memorial service to be held at the Staples Centre in Los Angeles, it was well put together. 

Though I wasn’t there in LA physically to be part of the mourning crowd, I could feel the air of sadness even from watching it on TV.  That was how much Michael Jackson had touched lives.  Michael had led a very colourful life from the time he was introduced to the world of glitz and glitters.  May seem like a glamorous life to some but only those who actually live those lives would know what their world is really all about.  From the very wide coverage of his death to all the ‘findings’ from the many tests and investigations, a lot of things had surfaced about the man who many adored and loved but knew nothing about.  There were so many speculations made about his mental stability, his lifestyle, his life, he as a human being…and like any sensational story, many will make their own theory of who they think Michael Jackson really was.  God knows who he is and the people whose lives he had touched knew who he was…honestly, I think that’s all that matters.

I will not mourn his death for long but I will celebrate his life for many, many years to come.  May you rest in peace now that you’re at a much better place.

  michael_jackson.jpg Michael Jackson image by MeeMee305Swagga

“He may be imitated but never be duplicated.” ~ Pastor Crucius Smith

The You I Never Knew…

Sometime a week ago I was shocked and saddened by a post that I came across in the bulletin board of a social networking website where I’m a member of.  One of the members was found brutally murdered on a deserted beach somewhere on the little island of Trinidad and Tobago.  The victim was a lady.  A single mother of four.  Her name was Gail and she was only 39 years old.

According to reports, she became quite close to a man on that website and they were chatting online regularly.  From casual friends the friendship grew more intimate when feelings and emotions were thrown into the mix.  They agreed to meet for the first time on the man’s birthday and from what I gather from reading her profile, Gail was a fun-loving person, very down to earth and a doting mother.  Whatever spin it was that the guy pulled on her must’ve been really, really good coz she didn’t seem like the type who’d just fall for anything.  

The cops there did their thing and found out that on the day she went to meet the dude, she had stopped at a cake shop to purchase a birthday cake and then headed on to a liquor store to get some alcohol.  Her destination was the beach.  Clearly she was planning for it to be a special and memorable first date.  Well, don’t know about the special part, but memorable it sure was – in the most tragic way.

I didn’t know Gail, never got the opportunity to cross paths with her but from the vibe I got from reading her profile I’m quite sure that had I had the chance to get to know her, she would’ve been a wonderful friend.  Even though I didn’t know her, in some way I too mourn with her family.  People in that website are still visiting her profile…leaving flowers, condolences, messages, etc.  It’s clear that the entire community of that website are shocked and saddened by this tragedy. 

This is my special tribute to Gail… the woman I never knew.  May you rest in peace.

road trip to shark river

 

Jun 15, 2009 6:23 am

This is such a sad tragedy. I didn’t know Gail but to know that she was taken from her family against her will and before her time…there are just no words to describe what I believe her family is going through. My heart and prayers and condolences I extend to your loved ones. May they find some comfort in knowing that you’re at a better place now. May you rest in peace, Gail.

Jun 15, 2009 6:44 am

MY HEART IS SADDEN THAT SUCH A BEAUTIFUL MOTHER, DAUGHTER,SISTER & A LOVING FRIEND IS GONE BECAUSE OF THE EVIL HANDS OF A MAN THAT’S CRUEL & EVIL. MY PRAYERS ARE WITH YOUR FAMILY AS MY HEART GOES OUT TO THEM FOR A JEWEL THAT WAS TAKEN FROM THEM BUT HEAVEN HAS GAINED AN ANGEL….REST IN PEACE GAIL AND KNOW THAT YOUR ONLINE FRIENDS LOVE YOU!!!!

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Jun 13, 2009 11:02 am

 

I’m so sorry to hear what happen to my dear. i’m so sorry your life had to be cut short all because of this monster who calls him self human. I wish i had known earlier that this would’ve happen to you. My god some men don’t have no heart.I wonder if he knows that its a lady who gave birth to him,i wonder if he knows that women are a blessing to us men, so why in gods name did he had to do this to you. I hope he knows that the bible says no deeds go unpunished and one day his day will come, not just him but all other men who kill people for no reason at all. I pray for your family and i know that others are praying for them as well. You are in jesus’s hands right now so you won’t be suffering no more. I know your up there watching over your kids and families, may the lord continue to shine on them, keep them safe and bless them in jesus name. I have written a letter after hearing of your death to all women out there who meet people on the net just to enlighten them. R.I.P BYE

Getting breakfast on the road to shark river

Jun 14, 2009 6:44 pm

When tomorrow starts without me, Please try to understand, That an angel came and called my name, And took me by the hand. The angel said my place was ready, In Heaven far above, And that I’d have to leave behind, All those I dearly love. But when I walked through Heaven’s gates, I felt so much at home, For God looked down, smiled at me, And told me “Welcome Home.” So when tomorrow starts without me, Don’t think we’re far apart, For everytime you think of me, I’m right there in your heart.

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Jun 15, 2009 1:12 am

im sorry to hear the news…May God be with you and a heartfelt condolences to her family… Whoever did this will get his retribution soon. A lesson to all women taggers to be extra careful when meeting someone we hardly know their intentions. I can understand Gail as she merely looked for love shes entitled to but someone just took that away from her. Im all hurt and full of sorrows for her children….. God pls help her family cope.
Yes this is our island....paradise right here

I took all these photos from her photo album and for this particular picture, this was the caption she wrote… “Yes, this is our island…paradise right here.”  And yet, it was also on this very same paradise that her life was cut short.

R.I.P Gail…

I’m back again with Part #2 of The Family gathering.  MAG booked us a private room at Baywatch, a cosy lil restaurant/bar/fun pub place at Dataran Prima.  There was none of those formal and fancy stuff, no organised plans or agenda planned for the night.  It was a ‘go with the flow’ kinda of a deal which suited everyone fine.

There was a long table set up for our party, and me and my gang…

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took fort at the far end of the table, where we were joined by…

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Mubarak, Marie, Martin and Arthur.  As you can see from the photo, there are beer glasses on the table, basically the vibe and momentum that we had at the Sunway Resort lounge, we took that with us to Baywatch.

Dinner… oh my God, there wasn’t any formality at all at the table!  Cash was picking from my plate and from Mandy’s, I was picking from Cash’s plate and from Mandy’s… it felt like having dinner with MY own family, it was awesome.  Not only that, we were talking with our mouth full, laughing really loud, argue with each other at the table… we were one helluva noisy bunch, I loved it.

After dinner, as what we were all aware of, it was time to record our Family website’s 10th webisode…

recording of webbie 10

… which will be uploaded to The Family website , and also on YouTube.   The lil feature was the brainwave of…

Steve…

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… aka Steve the Beef aka The Hubby, who is also MAG’s hubby.

Lots were captured that night, be it by camera or by heartfelt moments…

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… no shy or awkward moments, everybody chatted away like long lost friends.  It’s hard to believe that most of us were meeting up for the very first time.  There was so much love in that room that night, you could feel the thickness of it in the air.  Hugs were aplenty…

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… it was great.  There was brotherhood…

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… sisterhood…

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… there was unity.

At the end of the day, like “Heroes”…

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… that’s how we roll.

Keep the peace and spread the love…

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This is something which I had discovered recently.  In a few of my past posts I had written special tributes about a few remarkable individuals whom I had come across in my life, folks who had cross paths with me in the most unusual way, folks that I’ve become friends with.  And today I’d like to sit and look back on the journey that we had travelled so far.  It all started with…

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… Pat and his partner in crime…

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… MAG.  Together, they had creatively produced a radio show which had attracted a lot of active listeners who would participate in the contests, games, whatnots that they spring on the show every Monday to Friday afternoon.  The chemistry between MAG and Pat was hot and that helped to make the show a lot more exciting.  They both brought out their heart and soul when they’re on air, they kept it real by being true to themselves… no put on impressions or fake persona, just who they truly are.  That was the thing that drew me and so many others towards the show.  A bunch of strangers from all walks of life, scattered all over the country AND the UK, cross paths with one another on one common ground – a radio show.  From there we got to know each other and we grew so big, so close, so tight, that we started calling ourselves ‘The Family’…

"The Family"

"The Family"

We all decided to meet up and have a family gathering and since Martin and his wife, Marie…

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… were planning their trip here, we agreed to squeeze in the meet up during that time.  I was excited about meeting up with the family. 

On Friday, May 15th, Cash…

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… (fondly known as ‘the friendly cabbie’ among The Family) and I went to KLIA to pick up one of the most respected member of The Family… Arthur…

 

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…aka Cikgu Arthur aka Sir Arthur, take your pick.  That was the first time I met Arthur after give and take two years of knowing each other.  Was I disappointed?  Not one bit.  He was exactly like how I pictured him… big, warm and friendly.  The three of us had late lunch at a chicken rice shop along Jalan Bukit Bintang, chatted like long lost friends and finally walked Arthur back to his hotel around 5:00pm. 

My excitement exscalated to a maximum high when Cash arrived to pick me up for the gathering the next evening.  From my place we went into the city centre to pick Arthur at his hotel and from there shot straight to Sunway Lagoon Resort as the location of our meeting check point.   We went straight to the lounge located at the end of the hotel lobby and found the early birds there.  And so the party started with beer, light conversations, hugs, beer, laugh, beer, more conversations, more beer… and so it went until Pat got a call from MAG to inform us of the actual location where the party was to take place.

Stay tuned for more… Part #2 coming up shortly.

Friendship at its best…

Never Left Your Side

Over the last few years I had learned that friendship come in different shapes and forms.  They would come and show their true form at the most unexpected time.  But I also learned that those unexpected times are usually the times when you need them the most.

Just a few weeks ago a good friend of mine came to me to unload himself.  I sat and listened to him talk, and when he needed to cry I let him do it freely.  He really has a lot on his plate, I can tell that he wasn’t faking it.  Having to look after his bedridden mom and his active 2 year old nephew all on his own, that’s quite a load to handle, but he being the responsible son that he is, he took the responsibility with no question. 

But then, there’s another problem.  Financial.  He drives a cab for a living but looking after his mom and nephew takes up all his time which makes it hard for him to go out and earn money seeing that he doesn’t have anyone to help look after them when he goes out.  The bills are still gonna continue to come and they all still need to eat…  Needless to say, he was in a real dilemma.  He was desperate for his family but he just didn’t know what to do.  My heart really goes out to him and I was determined to help him in any which way that I could.

He and I met a few years ago, believe it or not, through a radio show.  From there, we met each other in person and clicked right from the get go.  From that show, we got to know a lot of other folks too.  Though we’re all scattered all over the country, friendship was born.  And it all happened on one particular show which unfortunately doesn’t exist anymore.  However, like I said earlier, friendship comes in different shapes and forms, so even though the show no longer exist, the friendship among ‘The Family’ continues to live.

A channel was created to allow easy access for The Family to catch up and communicate with each other.  It was through this channel that I shared my friend’s story to the rest of  The Family.  I got an immediate response from them.  Each voiced their concern for our friend and offered to help in any which way that they can.  I responded to their responses and thanked them all for their generosity and thoughtfulness.

The next day, one of sistas from The Family sent me a text.  She’s a teacher, got a promotion not too long ago, a mother, and a really kind soul.  She apologised for being quiet for so long and explained that she’s been swamped with work and everything else that’s been going on in her life.  She then said that she had seen my message in our channel and felt really sorry for our friend.  She then told me that she wanted to help him by giving him a love gift, and asked me if I could get his banking details so that she could proceed with sending him her love gift.  I was blown away by her kind generosity.  For her to offer such help considering that she has never met me or our friend… that is amazing beyond words.  I told her that I had to run it by our friend first to get his details and his go ahead – which I did, and true to her words, she sent him her love gift, which had helped him to breathe for a little longer. 

Pam, I salute you for you kindness and generosity.  I admire your thoughtfulness and unselfishness.  I respect you as a person for you have so much inner beauty.  And lastly, I’m blessed to have crossed paths with you and have you for a friend.

As for Cash, I know that times are rough for you right now but it will soon pass.  God doesn’t give us problems that we can’t handle, so there’s a reason why this is happening to you right now, just keep on believing that you will see that silver lining.  In the meantime, hang tight and know that you’re not alone.

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Written in the Stars…

Well, the month of February is upon us again… the one month in the calendar that is closely associated with love and romance due to Valentine’s Day that falls on the 14th day of  the month.  It’s the day where you can see young guys blowing an insane amount of money on their girlfriend – from very expensive roses, to very expensive box of chocolates which if he’s lucky, would have a small little soft teddy bear in the packaging, which would then lead to an expensive dinner at some restaurant or hotel, which possibly could then lead to a night at the clubs for more celebration of their love for each other – she gets to enjoy all the fuss, attention and expensive treats; while he foots all the bills, probably spend the entire time thinking of how broke he’s going to be after the day is through, but at the same time try to put on a happy smile so as to not spoil his loved one’s joy. 

Well, I have a classic love story to share, which has a lot to do with the title that I chose for this post.  And the story goes a lil something like this…

The year was 1986. A young 19 year old college girl went to watch a rugby match with her boyfriend whom she met in college.  They were both big rugby fans and would spend their weekends going for rugby games and friendly matches around the city.  That weekend, there was a friendly game between the Police force and an alumni of  old boys from a high school in Selangor.  It had rained earlier on so the ground was wet and she brought a brolly with her when she came out of the car – just in case.  As usual, being a Sunday afternoon, she was dressed casually in her faded denim jeans, sneakers and a pink and white baby tee.  She and her boyfriend chose a spot higher up on the stands where it wasn’t too crowded and watched the game from there.  She scanned her eyes to look at the players who were standing by the side of the field and noticed some familiar faces among them.  Then she spotted a tall guy.  He was clearly the tallest guy on the field and he was well-built too.  She checked out his face. Not familiar to her.  Like some magnetic pull, Tall Guy turned towards her direction where they automatically locked eyes.  She smiled.  He smiled back and the first whistle was blown as a cue for the players to get on the field as the game’s about to begin.  Tall Guy gave another look at the girl, flashed another smile and he was off. 

1996 … She was excited at being given the chance to go out in the field to the location where a new commercial will be filmed.  After just three months of joining the Production House, she was already given this chance and she was thrilled to bits, making a promise to herself that she’s going to give her all while on location.  The filming took her to the town of Raub, where they (the crew and talents) were put to stay in the Rest House, while the filming locations were located in the forest where there are rivers and water rapids.  It was hot and humid in the forest during the day, and not to mention the mosquitoes and bugs that crawled out of nowhere from everywhere.  Not much fun but because film and art is a passion of hers, she endured the lack of comfort.  After the first day ended, one of the crew, a tall guy, approached her and invited her to have dinner with him.  She wasn’t sure why, but she accepted and they made plans on where to meet and at what time.

Dinner went well and before long, they were talking to each other like old friends.  After dinner, while walking her to her room she asked him, “You’re quite a big guy and you’re really tall, have you ever played rugby?” At this point, they had already reached the steps of her balcony (it’s an old rest house and she got the room at the front).

Slowly he stopped his steps and turned to look at her.  Really look at her. “Yes,” he replied, “I used to play for the SMS Old Boys.  In fact, there was one friendly game we played at PULAPOL (Pusat Latihan Polis) field against the Police force… did you watch that game?”

She smiled.  “Yes, I did.”

Then he looked at her again.  A lot closely this time and then slowly said, “Were you wearing faded jeans and a pink and white t-shirt on that day? And were you also seated at the upper level of the stands?” he asked, his words rushed out.

She was puzzled by his question and it was her turn to study his face.  “Yes, that was definitely what I was wearing on that day,” she replied, still puzzled.

Tall Guy then broke into a smile and said, “You’re the one!” clasping both of her small hands into his big palms.  “Do you know that after you smiled at me on that rainy afternoon I’ve been thinking and wondering and even tried to find out abut you?  But I couldn’t find anything…” he paused a moment to gaze into her eyes then continued, “… until tonight.”

“Wow!” was all she could say at that point as her heart was beating so fast at the words that had just been spoken to her.  “That game happened like 10 years ago and you remembered what I was wearing??! Wow!”

February 13th, 1999 … She and the Tall Guy got married.  Everything was perfect – they have a lot in common, they work in the same industry, they’re both very ambitious and career driven, they communicate well, and they are very supportive of each other.  They are also both strong and independent individuals, driven with determination to achieve their own individual success.  They had a unique kind of relationship.

However, in their determination to chase for their own goals, they soon found themselves drifting further and further apart from each other.  There was no 3rd party involved in the picture, no scandals whatsoever… just pure ambition.  Work was taking them away from each other.  So much so they only get to see each other maybe a few weeks in a year.  They were no longer living together but were still in touch with each other.  And they were still husband and wife.

The separation went on for three years where in the process, she had met someone else and had fallen deeply in love with Mr. Island.  Things got really heavy and deep between her and Mr. Island but at the same time she still couldn’t forget her hubby, Tall Guy.  Mr. Island had his own dreams too, which is fair.  He wanted to build a life with her, make her his wife, the mother of his kids.  She was torn.  She didn’t know what to do. Should she forego her marriage and start a new life with Mr. Island?  Would  she be able to forget about Tall Guy if she chose to do that?  She battled with herself for months over this issue, not wanting to make a wrong decision.  Finally, she turned to God and asked Him for some guidance in making her decision.  He didn’t fail her and she made her decision.

2008 … She and Tall Guy got back together and ‘renewed’ their wedding vows.  They have both reached their goals in their careers and they are both ready to slow down and start focusing more on each other and their marriage.  They’ve grown even closer with this experience and as a couple, they have grown so much more stronger.  And today, on the 1st day of February 2009, just twelve days short of their 10th wedding anniversary, she’s sitting here in front of the computer screen sharing her ‘classic’ love story… Her own.

To my hubby, Putra… it’s been 10 long years, baby… but I’m still as crazy about you today as I was that night we shared in Raub.  We’ve been through one hell of a rollercoaser ride to get to where we are today, but I’m glad we took it together.  This is my special tribute to you, my small way of saying thank you for completing me and making me whole.  Happy Anniversary, Honey!  I love you forever and always.

why-i-love-you1

Who’s to say…

Friendster, MySpace, Facebook, Hi5… these are a few of the common names in the world of social networking sites. It’s a new way to meet new people and to make new friends. It can be a fun experience and it can also be a creepy one, depending on who you meet online.

I had just started joining in the fun a few months ago. It was more out of curiousity than anything else. I have to say that when I first joined site ‘A’, I was a real dork. Didn’t know what to do or how to go about getting stuff done that I had to ask some of the new friends that I had met on that site to help me out. Lol. What a dork! And then one of the guys from that site invited me to join another site, quite similar to the previous one. At first I wasn’t interested but he didn’t give up and kept inviting me. Finally I did and now I’m hooked. Lol.

Met some nice folks on site ‘B’ and through conversations via message box(I don’t do the ‘chat’ thing), I’ve made some good friends. Good enough that we’re able to share our thoughts and stuff about our personal lives with one another. Which then got me thinking… if friendship is able to grow just via words exchanged on computer screen, would it be possible for love to grow too?

Three guys actually told me that it’s possible. They had somehow ‘met’ the woman of their dreams in a social networking website and they are very positive that they are or have fallen in love.

Which got me thinking again… is it possible for one to fall in love with someone they’ve never met? Fall in love with words that they see on their computer screen? Knowing for a fact that they may never meet but yet still believe strongly in the love that they share? Hmmm…. the romantic side of me would love to say that yes, that is all possible to happen coz I believe in fairytales and happy ever after endings just like in Disney movies but… this is not Disneyland.

And so I made my own theory on this matter… people are attracted to the idea of fairytales and happy ever after endings. I mean, who wouldn’t be? The closest thing that they could get to that is through these websites. They usually go in as their alter-ego in search of whatever it is that they may fancy. There’s always a strong chance that one would meet at least one person whom they’d hit it off with from the get go and for some reason, it’s always someone of the opposite sex. They soon become fast friends, which then would lead to exchanging of sweet messages and comments, which could then lead to feelings being developed. In sites like these, one can make all their fantasies come true provided they have a game partner and there are no limits as to how much they can explore together. An illusion of a perfect fantasy. But once the computer’s turned off, it’s back to reality.  

And my conclusion is… Illusion and reality… don’t confuse the two.